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Monday, November 18, 2013

The Time I Was Attacked By A Bear

It was a nice & pleasant summer day until I found out I had to go hiking. I. Did. Not. Want. To. Go. Hiking. Under. Any. Circumstances. But parents being parents, made me. The plus side (and the only plus side) we were going with our friends visiting from Michigan.

But when we showed up the day got even better because we were hiking at Deer Valley so technically we weren't hiking. What do I mean by this? Well we got to ride the chair lift up and hike down again. Don't ask me why but I think it completely ruins the point of hiking, which completely made up for the fact I was forced to go hiking. *Happy Face!*

We take the chair lift to the top and let me tell you it was quite the view. I mean I've seen it before because I live here but my friends, I swear their jaws had dropped all the way down to the Pacific Ocean. Then they took over a million pictures, but I can relate, I take pictures of everything!

We finally began hiking down and I was straggling behind everyone else because I really was not in the mood to go hiking. And of course when I'm in the middle of nowhere my bladder decides to inform me that I have to go to the bathroom, RIGHT NOW! Once everyone is far enough ahead, I decided I was gonna pop-a-squat in an area full of bushes. That's when I noticed I was in trouble. There was a bear probably 20-feet away. Except I didn't think that the bear was a threat, my first thought was, "That'd be such a cool picture if I just had a camera, with all the flowers and the bear!" Then I realized what I just said, OHMYGOD THERE'S A BEAR!!!! The bear was looking directly at me. ME! Hopefully the bear's One Direction in disguise...

The Claw Marks From The Attack


Well the bear's probably just staring at me because I'm just so beautiful. Or for the fact I was just about to release my bladder in his territory. But I would really appreciate it Mr. Bear if you would stop staring at me so I can finish my business and leave. So I decided to avoid eye contact or else the situation would just get even more awkward.

Then the thought that the bear might be a predator came to mind, I ever so slowly start to back away from the bear. The bear took a step towards me and that was enough to scare me, I turned and ran (while screaming very loudly) back to the trail trying to catch up to my family and friends. I looked back, bad decision. The bear was following me and very fast too.

I was running as fast as Morgan can possibly run, (Which if you've ever seen me run, isn't all that fast) I was catching speed around one of the corners and of course Morgan being Morgan tripped. Of all times I could have tripped it was when I was being chased by a bear!

The bear caught up to me and was just pulling and tugging at my leg! I tried to escape but the bear just pulled even harder. He kept pulling and pulling and pulling at my leg, just like I'm pulling on your's right now!

See what I did there? I know, you don't need to tell me. I'm a very funny person. That reminds me, wanna here a joke? Even if you don't, I'll tell you anyways. What'd the horse say when it fell? I've fallen and I can't giddy-up!

Anyways, as I was saying, that whole story I told you, 100% not true. Well I guess it's more like 20% not true and 80% true. I do in fact have that scar but rather than being caused by a bear attacking me, it was my dear frenemy the bike. So just substitute the bear for the bike and hiking for biking and there's the real story!

I was not a happy camper to go biking
(notice the circled areas)

This is just got awkward... I just read over this post again and literally substituted hiking for biking and bear for bike, and that didn't work at all. "OHMYGOD THERE'S A BIKE!!!" - Who thinks that? Geez. I know I'm crazy but I promise you I'm not that kind of crazy!
Our friends from Michigan, my brother & I
(notice the circled areas)

(The circled areas indicate my shirt that was ripped and a bandage that was put over my boo-boo)

Well I hope none of you out there reading this have to deal with the physical and emotional pain of your once dear friend the bike attacking you. And if anyone of you have been attacked by a bear, I have four words for you. Glad I'm not you.


Friday, November 8, 2013

The Ten Truths About Birthdays

This past week I had my fifteenth birthday! I know hard to believe I've been on this planet for a whole fifteen years! And sadly no, I didn't get my permit. My parents won't let me get it until I actually "study." But I mean who actually studies for those things? Not Morgan!!! Anyways... I think birthdays are great but I mean birthdays aren't perfect. So here are The Ten Truths About Birthdays. 



Did you know I was the cutest one year
old to ever crawl on this planet? True fact


1. Birthday Cards
Birthday cards are my favoritist thing ever. I know every time I get dragged along to go the grocery store with my mom, I go look at the birthday cards. You know there's the sentimental ones but really... "AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT!" The best ones are the cards that sing to you! I mean you open it and it sings, you close it and it stops. Open. Close. Open. Close. Open. Close. Now don't tell me I'm the only one to ever do that, because I've watched all of you do it! But my absolute favorite ones, are the ones my friends make me! You know the ones that are hand made with the inside jokes, beautiful pictures and of course a little bit of the sentimental stuff.

2. Cake
Cake? That is so last year.

3. The Embarrassment 
Is it just me or is it the most awkward thing when you're just standing there and everyone is singing Happy Birthday to you? I just can't help it, my face turns bright, bright red!

4. The Fisher Tradition
Luckily the Fisher Tradition isn't to go fishing on your birthday, that'd be down right awful. The Fisher Tradition is to make your birthday last as long as humanly possible. However, I have a hard time of doing this because my birthday is in the first week in November so normally it last about two days. But hey, that's one more day than someone who doesn't use The Fisher Tradition.

5. Having To Reply To Everyone's Birthday Wishes
The best High School Musical party
that has ever existed
I mean who doesn't love getting 'Happy Birthday!' messages? I know I do! But you know how it is, the more you receive the more loved you feel. Except sometimes it causes problems... I just realized today, quite a few days after my birthday, I forgot to respond to nearly half of the birthday messages I got. Oops!

6. Pressure To Make Birthday Plans / Not Wanting To Exclude Anyone
Before the dawn of time when I still had birthday parties, I would invite every single one of my friends because I know how it felt to be left out. I don't know how my parents handled so many crazy kids running around but some how they managed. Now that I'm fifteen it just seems a little ridiculous to still have a birthday party. But you know what, maybe I want to have another High School Musical birthday party! The world may never know...

7. The Question
There's actually two pointless obnoxious questions that I know all of you have been asked before. 1. How does it feel to be a year older? Correction. I'm only a day older than I was yesterday. And I don't miraculously feel a whole year older! C'mon people, I'm the blonde one here!! 2. What do you want for your birthday? So we all know we actually want something but it's just an awko-taco moment because you don't actually want to tell them.

8. Happiness 24/7
It's near to impossible to be in a bad mood on your birthday; It's about 24 hours of complete and total happiness. It even makes getting up for school wonderful because I get CINNAMON ROLLS!!! And then this year when I showed up at school my dream car was awaiting me.

This is the actual car I received but
it's just as cool! When you pull it back,
a ghost suddenly drives it forward!
9. Presents and Surprises
I know this sounds selfish but I'm just telling the truth. We all know presents are the best part about birthdays. And the best kind of presents are the surprises. And this year I got the ultimate surprise in the whole entire world. But I'm going to leave you in suspense because I guarantee you I'll write about it in February, you know the month that comes after January.

10. Acting As If You Actually Like A Gift
I know we've all been in this situation. Your mom picks out some article of clothing you're just looking at it thinking, "What in the world was she thinking when she picked this out? I think this is the ugliest thing I've ever seen! I need to go wash my eyes!!!" But instead you just say, "Thanks Mom! I love it so much! This is probably the cutest thing ever!" And then you never ever wear it or even touch it again! Been there, done that!

In the end, I think birthdays are one of the greatest days of the year. They make you feel important with everyone wishing you a happy birthday and it's the one day of the year when everything seems centered around you! Just remember you share your birthday with approximately 19 million other people around the world. I had never met one of those other 19 million people until this past summer at camp. Happy birthday Tony!